The Unseen Strength: Motherhood, and the Power of Sharing, Speaking, and Healing

This summer, I embarked on a journey that unexpectedly healed parts of me I didn't even remember were broken. As a mental health consultant, I've had the privilege of providing mental health education, support, and awareness to a group of Latina mothers. This experience, coming just a year after graduating with my master's, has truly solidified my path.

I remember feeling a bit lost after graduation, unsure where my career would take me. In my 40s, I had just completed a master's degree many years after my bachelor's. It felt like a "crazy idea" to go back to school at this stage – yet, why not add more to the plate? Then, I stumbled upon an article about perinatal mental health, and it was like a lightbulb went off. "This is it," I thought, "this is what I want to do – educate about mental health awareness in mothers." Since then, doors have opened in ways I never imagined. Before I knew it, I was working as a clinical social worker at a hospital, providing mental health support and resources to new moms, high-risk pregnant women, and their babies. Yes, there are tough days, but they are immensely rewarding.

This journey back to the heart of maternal mental health felt full circle. I've always been open about my own struggles with postpartum depression, depression, and anxiety. Sometimes, I look back and can't believe how far I've come. Other times, the guilt creeps in, a stark reminder to practice self-compassion.

The Unknowns of Motherhood

As humans, I believe everything we don't know causes fear. The more we learn, the more prepared we become to at least make informed decisions. Yet, one thing truly prepared me for motherhood: nothing. Every day in the hospital, I tell new parents three things I wish someone had told me about being a parent:

• Time flies. One day you're holding tiny babies; the next, they've grown in a blink.

• The only thing your child truly needs from you is time. This is why parenting is so hard when we have to juggle so many roles.

• To give them that time, you need to be okay, physically and mentally.

What a challenge, right? How can you even think about self-care when you haven't slept since before they arrived, for example? Being a mother (or a parent) is like a light switch that turns on in your brain and never goes off. You're always worrying about something, depending on the stage. You're grateful they're healthy and growing, and then you worry again – always a different worry. How do we do it?

Resilience in the Face of Adversity

I often find myself thinking I wasn't prepared to be a single mom, to do this by myself sometimes. I didn't sign up for this. Who am I kidding? There are so many things in life we don't sign up for, but here we are. I truly believe we all have choices, and with motherhood, those choices are often conflicting.

This mothers' group, these brave women, have opened their hearts in ways that are simply unbelievable. Their stories are incredible, and one thing they all possess, no matter where they come from, is resilience. They've navigated trauma, abuse, immigration, violence, and many other challenges, and yet, they are still standing, showing up for their children and their families, not giving up.

It's more than just "not giving up," though. These mothers are constantly reinventing their stories, breaking generational binds, and driven by love and the powerful hope that it will work out. As one mom beautifully put it, "As we learn from our children and truly know them, we also learn about ourselves." This journey of motherhood is a profound path of self-discovery, highlighting why practicing self-compassion is so crucial. It's a constant reminder that it's okay not to be okay every day. There will be times that are hard, but everything is temporary. The bad feelings will pass; we just have to remain constant, remain present, and always hold onto hope and love for better days.

The Full Circle of Healing

I recently shared with them that my own experience with postpartum depression was marked by complete isolation. It was just me and my thoughts – intrusive thoughts. I often asked myself, "Why do I need to see and talk about my feelings with a stranger?" But life comes full circle again. And there they were, sharing their stories with a "stranger"—me—opening their hearts and showing profound compassion and kindness to each other.

This journey, I know, is just the beginning of a new chapter for me. Through all the struggles I've faced, I've always been clear about one thing: I want to be the best I can be. I aim to do my best every day, and "best" doesn't mean perfection. I often think about interrupting inherited patterns – not because I had a difficult upbringing, but because of the conscious choices I make as an adult. How can I do things differently? These incredible Latina Mothers, in their wisdom, gave me the answer:

This is how you do it: by speaking and healing, by sharing your stories, and by continuing to show up with self-love and self-compassion. Because sometimes, we must love ourselves deeply to truly be able to love our children and teach them what love really means.

This is what I want to say to all the amazing women who are also mothers, daughters, wives, sisters, and friends out there: You are great. Even in the darkness, you continue to shine, show up, and love. I hope you know how much you are appreciated, and how much you are changing generations to come.